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Traumatize Your Kids At Any Age

There are ways to traumatize your grown children.  I have accidentally stumbled upon a good one.

First, I must explain that our house is kind of like a double wide mobile home.  The original owner attached two army barracks together and then added an additional room.  At least, that is the story I have heard from neighbors. My bedroom is at one end of the house, and the only bathroom is at the other end.  This makes the middle of the night potty runs kind of like exercise.  It’s a bit of a walk.

This week, five of the eight boys I watch had a stomach virus.  I agreed to stay and care for them so the parents could work.  I don’t mind.  Many people get grossed out when someone is sick, but it doesn’t bother me much.  After thirty years of caring for kids, I have been puked on, peed and pooped on, and had many a booger rubbed on me.


After three days of this, I got the silly virus!  I was hoping that my immune system would be tough enough, but that was silly.  I think as I get older, it is getting weaker.

So, I was in my comfy pajamas and my tummy was throwing a tantrum.  I knew I had better run for it!  What I forgot as I jogged down the hall and into the living room on my journey to the bathroom, was that my pajama pants are way too big since I lost fifteen pounds ( I still have at least 12 to go, but I am getting there).  So, halfway through the living room, my pants decide to get a head start and fell to my knees causing me to trip the rest of the way to the bathroom.  I’m quite sure both kids were out there when I flew through, but they were both gone when I made my trek back to my bedroom.  I think of shock of seeing mom running with her pants down caused them to run to their bedroom closets and hide in fear for a while.

So, if you become ill, make sure you have on well-fitting pants!  Save your child’s sanity!

The end.


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